TALE OF THE TAB.
May 11, 2011 § Leave a comment
Okay so I know that the title is morosely stupid BUT I FEEL THAT THIS TALE OF HOW I GOT MY GALAXY TAB NEEDS TO BE TOLD. (Btw, playing games on it IS SO FUN WHEEEEEEEEEEE.)
So I was lying down on my bed on Sunday night doing nothing productive like plotting to save lab-tested animals, finding the cure for cancer or promoting racial equality in countries like Iraq, when I realized…
I. HAVE. DONE. NOTHING. PRODUCTIVE. WITH. MY. LIFE!!! NOTHING AT ALL!!!!
I mean, ok lah I’ve won a few music competitions BUT STILL!!! People my age are lobbying for gender rights in 3-rd world countries where women won’t be subjected to doing house-hold chores, inoculating war refugees in countries like Kazakhstan or you know, winning nobel prices for being able to clone houseflies or calculate fractions.
AND WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!?!?!
ANGSTING OVER HOW OFTEN MY HAIR BREAKS OFF, HOW TO CONVINCE MY DOG TO EXERCISE OR FRETTING OVER THE AMOUNT OF CLOTHES I WANNA BUY…WHEN I COULD BE USING MY SUPERIOR INTELLIGENCE OF AN IQ OF116 TO SAVE THE WORLD AND MAKE IT A BETTER PLACE!!!
Eventually I got so depressed that I was CRIPPLED WITH GRIEF cause all I did was to lie down on my bed, listening to sad music (NeedToBreathe<3) and trying to nurse my fractious soul by wallowing in knee-deep depression.
I think my brother is seriously the bomb when he wants to be. HAHAHAHAHA that boy made me 6 peanut butter sandwiches and donated a 1.5 litre tub of ice-cream when he saw me lying prostrate with self-induced agony. Ok lah, I had to blackmail him with his drunken photos to give it to me but still.
BUT IT DOESN’T STOP THERE!!!
My depression spiralled downwards when I realized that I COULD ALSO BE USING MY LIFE TO SAVE THE POLAR BEARS, SEALS OR OTHER FURRY CUTE ANIMALS TO PREVENT THE COMPLETE DESECRATION OF AN ECO-SYSTEM. Hence, I figured a DOUBLE MCSPICY BURGER, 2 LARGE PACKET OF FRIES AND A LARGE COKE WILL SUFFICE LOL.
So where does the Samsung Galaxy Tab come about? LOL, apparently whilst I was eating my food and trying not to burst into convulsions and tears from the emotional maelstrom inside me, my Dad walked past, took one look at me and went…
“You look fucking depressed, you want my Galaxy Tab?” and proceeded to dump it on my bed before walking off, CLEARLY IGNORING THE FACT THAT HIS ELDEST SON WAS MOURNING OVER HIS REALIZATION THAT HE HASN’T ACHIEVED SELF-ACTUALIZATION!!!
END OF STORY.
PS : Congrats on reading this over-dramatic and horribly-thought-out story HAHAHAHAHA. HERE’S MY FORMSPRING PAGE WHERE I WILL ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS UNLESS THEY’RE STUPID. http://www.formspring.me/bryangohey